The King and Queen of Hearts were seated on their
throne when they arrived, with a great crowd assembled
about them--all sorts of little birds and beasts, as well
as the whole pack of cards: the Knave was standing before
them, in chains, with a soldier on each side to guard
him; and near the King was the White Rabbit, with a
trumpet in one hand, and a scroll of parchment in the
other. In the very middle of the court was a table, with
a large dish of tarts upon it: they looked so good, that
it made Alice quite hungry to look at them--`I wish
they'd get the trial done,' she thought, `and hand round
the refreshments!' But there seemed to be no chance of
this, so she began looking at everything about her, to
pass away the time.
Alice had never been in a court of justice before, but
she had read about them in books, and she was quite
pleased to find that she knew the name of nearly
everything there. `That's the judge,' she said to
herself, `because of his great wig.'
The judge, by the way, was the King; and as he wore
his crown over the wig, (look at the frontispiece if you
want to see how he did it,) he did not look at all
comfortable, and it was certainly not becoming.
`And that's the jury-box,' thought Alice, `and those
twelve creatures,' (she was obliged to say `creatures,'
you see, because some of them were animals, and some were
birds,) `I suppose they are the jurors.' She said this
last word two or three times over to herself, being
rather proud of it: for she thought, and rightly too,
that very few little girls of her age knew the meaning of
it at all. However, `jury-men' would have done just as
The twelve jurors were all writing very busily on
slates. `What are they doing?' Alice whispered to the
Gryphon. `They can't have anything to put down yet,
before the trial's begun.'
`They're putting down their names,' the Gryphon
whispered in reply, `for fear they should forget them
before the end of the trial.'
`Stupid things!' Alice began in a loud, indignant
voice, but she stopped hastily, for the White Rabbit
cried out, `Silence in the court!' and the King put on
his spectacles and looked anxiously round, to make out
who was talking.
Alice could see, as well as if she were looking over
their shoulders, that all the jurors were writing down
`stupid things!' on their slates, and she could even make
out that one of them didn't know how to spell `stupid,'
and that he had to ask his neighbour to tell him. `A nice
muddle their slates'll be in before the trial's over!'
One of the jurors had a pencil that squeaked. This of
course, Alice could not stand, and she went round the
court and got behind him, and very soon found an
opportunity of taking it away. She did it so quickly that
the poor little juror (it was Bill, the Lizard) could not
make out at all what had become of it; so, after hunting
all about for it, he was obliged to write with one finger
for the rest of the day; and this was of very little use,
as it left no mark on the slate.
`Herald, read the accusation!' said the King.
On this the White Rabbit blew three blasts on the
trumpet, and then unrolled the parchment scroll, and read
`The Queen of Hearts, she made some tarts,
All on a summer day:
The Knave of Hearts, he stole those tarts,
And took them quite away!'
`Consider your verdict,' the King said to the jury.
`Not yet, not yet!' the Rabbit hastily interrupted.
`There's a great deal to come before that!'
`Call the first witness,' said the King; and the White
Rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet, and called out,
The first witness was the Hatter. He came in with a
teacup in one hand and a piece of bread-and-butter in the
other. `I beg pardon, your Majesty,' he began, `for
bringing these in: but I hadn't quite finished my tea
when I was sent for.'
`You ought to have finished,' said the King. `When did
The Hatter looked at the March Hare, who had followed
him into the court, arm-in-arm with the Dormouse.
`Fourteenth of March, I think it was,' he said.
`Fifteenth,' said the March Hare.
`Sixteenth,' added the Dormouse.
`Write that down,' the King said to the jury, and the
jury eagerly wrote down all three dates on their slates,
and then added them up, and reduced the answer to
shillings and pence.
`Take off your hat,' the King said to the Hatter.
`It isn't mine,' said the Hatter.
`Stolen!' the King exclaimed, turning to the jury, who
instantly made a memorandum of the fact.
`I keep them to sell,' the Hatter added as an
explanation; `I've none of my own. I'm a hatter.'
Here the Queen put on her spectacles, and began
staring at the Hatter, who turned pale and fidgeted.
`Give your evidence,' said the King; `and don't be
nervous, or I'll have you executed on the spot.'
This did not seem to encourage the witness at all: he
kept shifting from one foot to the other, looking
uneasily at the Queen, and in his confusion he bit a
large piece out of his teacup instead of the bread-and-butter.
Just at this moment Alice felt a very curious
sensation, which puzzled her a good deal until she made
out what it was: she was beginning to grow larger again,
and she thought at first she would get up and leave the
court; but on second thoughts she decided to remain where
she was as long as there was room for her.
`I wish you wouldn't squeeze so.' said the Dormouse,
who was sitting next to her. `I can hardly breathe.'
`I can't help it,' said Alice very meekly: `I'm
`You've no right to grow here,' said the Dormouse.
`Don't talk nonsense,' said Alice more boldly: `you
know you're growing too.'
`Yes, but I grow at a reasonable pace,' said the
Dormouse: `not in that ridiculous fashion.' And he got up
very sulkily and crossed over to the other side of the
All this time the Queen had never left off staring at
the Hatter, and, just as the Dormouse crossed the court,
she said to one of the officers of the court, `Bring me
the list of the singers in the last concert!' on which
the wretched Hatter trembled so, that he shook both his
`Give your evidence,' the King repeated angrily, `or
I'll have you executed, whether you're nervous or not.'
`I'm a poor man, your Majesty,' the Hatter began, in a
trembling voice, `--and I hadn't begun my tea--not above
a week or so--and what with the bread-and-butter getting
so thin--and the twinkling of the tea--'
`The twinkling of the what?' said the King.
`It began with the tea,' the Hatter replied.
`Of course twinkling begins with a T!' said the King
sharply. `Do you take me for a dunce? Go on!'
`I'm a poor man,' the Hatter went on, `and most things
twinkled after that--only the March Hare said--'
`I didn't!' the March Hare interrupted in a great
`You did!' said the Hatter.
`I deny it!' said the March Hare.
`He denies it,' said the King: `leave out that part.'
`Well, at any rate, the Dormouse said--' the Hatter
went on, looking anxiously round to see if he would deny
it too: but the Dormouse denied nothing, being fast
`After that,' continued the Hatter, `I cut some more
`But what did the Dormouse say?' one of the jury asked.
`That I can't remember,' said the Hatter.
`You MUST remember,' remarked the King, `or I'll have
The miserable Hatter dropped his teacup and bread-and-butter,
and went down on one knee. `I'm a poor man, your
Majesty,' he began.
`You're a very poor speaker,' said the King.
Here one of the guinea-pigs cheered, and was
immediately suppressed by the officers of the court. (As
that is rather a hard word, I will just explain to you
how it was done. They had a large canvas bag, which tied
up at the mouth with strings: into this they slipped the
guinea-pig, head first, and then sat upon it.)
`I'm glad I've seen that done,' thought Alice. `I've
so often read in the newspapers, at the end of trials,
"There was some attempts at applause, which was
immediately suppressed by the officers of the court,"
and I never understood what it meant till now.'
`If that's all you know about it, you may stand down,'
continued the King.
`I can't go no lower,' said the Hatter: `I'm on the
floor, as it is.'
`Then you may SIT down,' the King replied.
Here the other guinea-pig cheered, and was suppressed.
`Come, that finished the guinea-pigs!' thought Alice.
`Now we shall get on better.'
`I'd rather finish my tea,' said the Hatter, with an
anxious look at the Queen, who was reading the list of
`You may go,' said the King, and the Hatter hurriedly
left the court, without even waiting to put his shoes on.
`--and just take his head off outside,' the Queen
added to one of the officers: but the Hatter was out of
sight before the officer could get to the door.
`Call the next witness!' said the King.
The next witness was the Duchess's cook. She carried
the pepper-box in her hand, and Alice guessed who it was,
even before she got into the court, by the way the people
near the door began sneezing all at once.
`Give your evidence,' said the King.
`Shan't,' said the cook.
The King looked anxiously at the White Rabbit, who
said in a low voice, `Your Majesty must cross-examine
`Well, if I must, I must,' the King said, with a
melancholy air, and, after folding his arms and frowning
at the cook till his eyes were nearly out of sight, he
said in a deep voice, `What are tarts made of?'
`Pepper, mostly,' said the cook.
`Treacle,' said a sleepy voice behind her.
`Collar that Dormouse,' the Queen shrieked out.
`Behead that Dormouse! Turn that Dormouse out of court!
Suppress him! Pinch him! Off with his whiskers!'
For some minutes the whole court was in confusion,
getting the Dormouse turned out, and, by the time they
had settled down again, the cook had disappeared.
`Never mind!' said the King, with an air of great
relief. `Call the next witness.' And he added in an
undertone to the Queen, `Really, my dear, YOU must cross-examine
the next witness. It quite makes my forehead ache!'
Alice watched the White Rabbit as he fumbled over the
list, feeling very curious to see what the next witness
would be like, `--for they haven't got much evidence
YET,' she said to herself. Imagine her surprise, when the
White Rabbit read out, at the top of his shrill little
voice, the name `Alice!'