THE reader may rest satisfied that Tom's and
Huck's windfall made a mighty stir in the poor little village of
St. Petersburg. So vast a sum, all in actual cash, seemed next to
incredible. It was talked about, gloated over, glorified, until
the reason of many of the citizens tottered under the strain of
the unhealthy excitement. Every "haunted" house in St.
Petersburg and the neighboring villages was dissected, plank by
plank, and its foundations dug up and ransacked for hidden
treasure — and not by boys, but men — pretty
grave, unromantic men, too, some of them. Wherever Tom and Huck
appeared they were courted, admired, stared at. The boys were not
able to remember that their remarks had possessed weight before;
but now their sayings were treasured and repeated; everything
they did seemed somehow to be regarded as remarkable; they had
evidently lost the power of doing and saying commonplace things;
moreover, their past history was raked up and discovered to bear
marks of conspicuous originality. The village paper published
biographical sketches of the boys.
The Widow Douglas put Huck's money out at
six per cent., and Judge Thatcher did the same with Tom's at Aunt
Polly's request. Each lad had an income, now, that was simply
prodigious — a dollar for every week-day in the year and
half of the Sundays. It was just what the minister got —
no, it was what he was promised — he generally couldn't
collect it. A dollar and a quarter a week would board, lodge, and
school a boy in those old simple days — and clothe him
and wash him, too, for that matter.
Judge Thatcher had conceived a great opinion
of Tom. He said that no commonplace boy would ever have got his
daughter out of the cave. When Becky told her father, in strict
confidence, how Tom had taken her whipping at school, the Judge
was visibly moved; and when she pleaded grace for the mighty lie
which Tom had told in order to shift that whipping from her
shoulders to his own, the Judge said with a fine outburst that it
was a noble, a generous, a magnanimous lie — a lie that
was worthy to hold up its head and march down through history
breast to breast with George Washington's lauded Truth about the
hatchet! Becky thought her father had never looked so tall and so
superb as when he walked the floor and stamped his foot and said
that. She went straight off and told Tom about it.
Judge Thatcher hoped to see Tom a great
lawyer or a great soldier some day. He said he meant to look to
it that Tom should be admitted to the National Military Academy
and afterward trained in the best law school in the country, in
order that he might be ready for either career or both.
Huck Finn's wealth and the fact that he was
now under the Widow Douglas' protection introduced him into
society — no, dragged him into it, hurled him into it — and his sufferings were almost more than he could bear.
The widow's servants kept him clean and neat, combed and brushed,
and they bedded him nightly in unsympathetic sheets that had not
one little spot or stain which he could press to his heart and
know for a friend. He had to eat with a knife and fork; he had to
use napkin, cup, and plate; he had to learn his book, he had to
go to church; he had to talk so properly that speech was become
insipid in his mouth; whithersoever he turned, the bars and
shackles of civilization shut him in and bound him hand and foot.
He bravely bore his miseries three weeks,
and then one day turned up missing. For forty-eight hours the
widow hunted for him everywhere in great distress. The public
were profoundly concerned; they searched high and low, they
dragged the river for his body. Early the third morning Tom
Sawyer wisely went poking among some old empty hogsheads down
behind the abandoned slaughter-house, and in one of them he found
the refugee. Huck had slept there; he had just breakfasted upon
some stolen odds and ends of food, and was lying off, now, in
comfort, with his pipe. He was unkempt, uncombed, and clad in the
same old ruin of rags that had made him picturesque in the days
when he was free and happy. Tom routed him out, told him the
trouble he had been causing, and urged him to go home. Huck's
face lost its tranquil content, and took a melancholy cast. He
said:
"Don't talk about it, Tom. I've tried
it, and it don't work; it don't work, Tom. It ain't for me; I
ain't used to it. The widder's good to me, and friendly; but I
can't stand them ways. She makes me get up just at the same time
every morning; she makes me wash, they comb me all to thunder;
she won't let me sleep in the woodshed; I got to wear them blamed
clothes that just smothers me, Tom; they don't seem to any air
git through 'em, somehow; and they're so rotten nice that I can't
set down, nor lay down, nor roll around anywher's; I hain't slid
on a cellar-door for — well, it 'pears to be years; I got
to go to church and sweat and sweat — I hate them ornery
sermons! I can't ketch a fly in there, I can't chaw. I got to
wear shoes all Sunday. The widder eats by a bell; she goes to bed
by a bell; she gits up by a bell — everything's so awful
reg'lar a body can't stand it."
"Well, everybody does that way, Huck."
"Tom, it don't make no difference. I
ain't everybody, and I can't stand it. It's awful to be
tied up so. And grub comes too easy — I don't take no
interest in vittles, that way. I got to ask to go a-fishing; I
got to ask to go in a-swimming — dern'd if I hain't got
to ask to do everything. Well, I'd got to talk so nice it wasn't
no comfort — I'd got to go up in the attic and rip out
awhile, every day, to git a taste in my mouth, or I'd a died, Tom.
The widder wouldn't let me smoke; she wouldn't let me yell, she
wouldn't let me gape, nor stretch, nor scratch, before folks — " [Then with a spasm of special irritation and injury]
— "And dad fetch it, she prayed all the time! I
never see such a woman! I had to shove, Tom — I
just had to. And besides, that school's going to open, and I'd a
had to go to it — well, I wouldn't stand that, Tom.
Looky-here, Tom, being rich ain't what it's cracked up to be.
It's just worry and worry, and sweat and sweat, and a-wishing you
was dead all the time. Now these clothes suits me, and this bar'l
suits me, and I ain't ever going to shake 'em any more. Tom, I
wouldn't ever got into all this trouble if it hadn't 'a' ben for
that money; now you just take my sheer of it along with your'n,
and gimme a ten-center sometimes — not many times, becuz
I don't give a dern for a thing 'thout it's tollable hard to git
— and you go and beg off for me with the widder."
"Oh, Huck, you know I can't do that.
'Tain't fair; and besides if you'll try this thing just a while
longer you'll come to like it."
"Like it! Yes — the way I'd
like a hot stove if I was to set on it long enough. No, Tom, I
won't be rich, and I won't live in them cussed smothery houses. I
like the woods, and the river, and hogsheads, and I'll stick to
'em, too. Blame it all! just as we'd got guns, and a cave, and
all just fixed to rob, here this dern foolishness has got to come
up and spile it all!"
Tom saw his opportunity —
"Lookyhere, Huck, being rich ain't
going to keep me back from turning robber."
"No! Oh, good-licks; are you in real
dead-wood earnest, Tom?"
"Just as dead earnest as I'm sitting
here. But Huck, we can't let you into the gang if you ain't
respectable, you know."
Huck's joy was quenched.
"Can't let me in, Tom? Didn't you let
me go for a pirate?"
"Yes, but that's different. A robber is
more high-toned than what a pirate is — as a general
thing. In most countries they're awful high up in the nobility — dukes and such."
"Now, Tom, hain't you always ben
friendly to me? You wouldn't shet me out, would you, Tom? You
wouldn't do that, now, would you, Tom?"
"Huck, I wouldn't want to, and I don't
want to — but what would people say? Why, they'd say,
'Mph! Tom Sawyer's Gang! pretty low characters in it!' They'd
mean you, Huck. You wouldn't like that, and I wouldn't."
Huck was silent for some time, engaged in a
mental struggle. Finally he said:
"Well, I'll go back to the widder for a
month and tackle it and see if I can come to stand it, if you'll
let me b'long to the gang, Tom."
"All right, Huck, it's a whiz! Come
along, old chap, and I'll ask the widow to let up on you a
little, Huck."
"Will you, Tom — now will you?
That's good. If she'll let up on some of the roughest things,
I'll smoke private and cuss private, and crowd through or bust.
When you going to start the gang and turn robbers?"
"Oh, right off. We'll get the boys
together and have the initiation to-night, maybe."
"Have the which?"
"Have the initiation."
"What's that?"
"It's to swear to stand by one another,
and never tell the gang's secrets, even if you're chopped all to
flinders, and kill anybody and all his family that hurts one of
the gang."
"That's gay — that's mighty
gay, Tom, I tell you."
"Well, I bet it is. And all that
swearing's got to be done at midnight, in the lonesomest,
awfulest place you can find — a ha'nted house is the
best, but they're all ripped up now."
"Well, midnight's good, anyway, Tom."
"Yes, so it is. And you've got to swear
on a coffin, and sign it with blood."
"Now, that's something like!
Why, it's a million times bullier than pirating. I'll stick to
the widder till I rot, Tom; and if I git to be a reg'lar ripper
of a robber, and everybody talking 'bout it, I reckon she'll be
proud she snaked me in out of the wet."